Rock Star Rehab

The never ending carousel of rockstars checking in to rehab continued to spin this week when 60 year old ‘Aerosmith’ frontman Steven Tyler checked himself in to the Pasedena Recovery Center. The rehab facility was also the setting for ‘Celebrity Rehab’ and no information has been released as to what Tyler feels he needs to get over. Tyler has a history of drug abuse and him and Joe Perry were often referred to as the ‘Toxic Twins’ because of their notorious abuse of stimulants and heroin.

It’s kind of crappy hearing this bad news about Tyler because apparently he had been clean since 1986. You can believe that if you want, but we’re not sure we buy it, he may have cleaned up a bit but we aren’t sold that he got all the way there. Regardless, we just hope that if he did fall off the wagon that he hit a homerun and started shooting up again or something along those lines. It would be unfortunate if he was going to rehab for something lame like being addicted to getting his lips done.

CrüeFest

As Mötley Crüe get set to head out on the road and headline the first ever CrüeFest with Buckcherry, Papa Roach, Trapt, and Sixx: A.M. (Nikki Sixx’s side project) the band let some details about the tour slip. Nikki Sixx has promised lots of pyro for the bands set at CrüeFest and delivers the quote "Most artists say, 'Can you keep that fire away from me?' We want to be in the fire!" Hopefully this will make for a pretty bad ass 90 minute set from the headliners. Also, when asked how CrüeFest is different from Ozzfest, Sixx says that they expect a split crowd of women and men as opposed to Ozzfest which is a huge sausage-fest. Sixx feels the combination of rock & roll, beer and titties will be more than enough to satisfy the dudes that come out CrüeFest.

Pyro, beer, boobs and the Crüe… it sounds like a good time to us, where do we sign up? CrüeFest, which runs through July 1st to August 31st, seems like one of those tours that is going to absolutely rage. The only bummer is that it doesn’t seem like the Crüe is going to have the ‘Titty Cam’ on this tour even though it should be a requirement for a Mötley Crüe tour. On the bright side, it is pretty much a guarantee that there will be titties popping out everywhere, it is a Mötley Crüe show, all you have to do is keep your eyes peeled for women peeling off their tops.

He Stole Pearls Man

Remember bands like N*Sync and the Backstreet Boys? Unfortunately, so do we and we have always held a huge grudge against that bastard Lou Pearlman who was the mastermind behind those bands success and the demise of music in the 90’s. Luckily for us, back in the day Pearlman decided it would be a good idea to scam his family, friends and banks for more than $300 million and because of that decision he was sentenced to spend 25 years in prison! Pearlman tricked people in to investing in businesses that existed only on paper and while it is terrible people have lost their life savings, we’re kind of happy it happened because now Pearlman can’t assemble and more garbage groups.

Karma can be a real bitch and Lou Pearlman found that out the hard way. When you force crappy music down people’s throats while stealing money from people it is only a matter of time before you get yours. All Pearlman can do now is hope he isn’t made someone’s bitch in prison and maybe that he discovers a couple of young men with decent voices singing in the communal showers so he can try to create a new craze of ‘prison pop.’